Birthday Edition
Another trip around the sun. The same old habits. Tell us what they have been up to all year and we turn it into an official birthday notice, with cake, candles, a threat level and a mission for the year ahead.
Birthday cards get a glance and land in a drawer. An official birthday complaint gets read out loud, passed around the table and photographed. It is about their real life, so everyone at the party gets the joke right away.
Pair it with the certificate and their gift becomes a mission: complete the challenge on the letter, then open the sealed award.
Department of Household Emergencies · Birthday Edition
Dear Maya,
Happy birthday. The Department has reviewed the past 365 days and opened a case.
Tap one to open the letter builder with it already filled in. You can change anything before you pay.
Tap an idea or type it plainly. Add one real, funny detail if you have one.
From Mild Concern to Full Disaster Movie. The preview rewrites itself as you go.
Print it at home in minutes, have us seal it and mail it, or do both: hand over the printout today and let the official copy arrive later. A reply QR code is on every letter.
Print at home for $4.99 and it is ready in minutes. Have it mailed for $9.99, or choose both for $11.99 and hand over the printout at the party while the official copy arrives by mail later.
Pick Best friend in step 1 and roast their year of late replies, gently.
Mention the milestone in your funny detail and the letter works it in.
Milestone birthdays are perfect. Add the certificate for an award they earn by completing a mission.
Have it mailed so an official envelope arrives on their birthday week.
Unlike a card, a letter about their real habits gets read out loud at the party.
Pick Husband or Wife in step 1 and pair it with a real birthday reward.
Yes. Milestone birthdays are perfect. Mention the number in your funny detail and the letter works it in.
Yes. Put "The Group Chat" or a few names in the From box.
These letters are written for adults and teens, about silly everyday habits.
Two minutes to write. A lifetime of "remember when you got that letter?"
Write a birthday letter